How Can She Move On So Quickly?

Did She Ever Love Me?

You felt like the two of you shared something special. All you can think about are the memories of the way she looked at you, the things she would say, the promises she made. She always talked about the future when the two of you were together, even more so than you…

If she really felt that way, then how can she move on so quickly?

You think about the way she’s acting now, cold, distant, unresponsive… or maybe she’s already dating someone else, and you wonder how? How could she say all of those things, be so in love with you, and then as if, in an instant, change?

So, What Changed?

There are numerous things that could have changed for her. The truth is that if you asked her she probably couldn’t tell you because most of this stuff is unconscious for her. In a nutshell, she thought things were good between the two of you, then something happened in your relationship, an argument, a disappointment, a hurt, and her feelings started to change. This didn’t happen overnight, but progressively.

As you know, relationships aren’t perfect. We all have grievances with our significant others, some of which are expressed and some unexpressed. Not a big deal, right?! Usually, all of the good stuff outweighs the bad, and keeps the two of you together. That’s pretty standard!

The problem starts when one person in the relationship starts to give more weight to the “bad stuff” over the good stuff for an extended period of time, while still in the relationship. The “bad stuff” will grow larger, especially if she’s mulling over it continually and not communicating with you about what her grievances are. The “bad stuff” for her can then spark thoughts of ending the relationship. She may then be thinking about breaking up with you for weeks and even months before she finally decides to make that decision.

If It Seemed Quick For You It Wasn’t For Her

If she starts focusing on what’s wrong in the relationship, a few almost imperceptible things will happen progressively as she begins to wonder if you are the right person for her.

She might give you clues. She’ll passively take little jabs at you or hint at what she needs or what’s missing but won’t flat out say it. There are many ways women hint at problems in the relationship. She might even test you to see if you pick up on any of the clues and try to fix the problem, she’ll notice if you don’t and it will further fuel her grievances against you. If you look back at your relationship you might notice some of these clues.

She will talk with her friends and family about your relationship. Especially if she feels like she can’t bring the issues up to you. She’ll have conversations with them about her thoughts on you, on your relationship, and even about breaking up. She will seek their advice and will formulate her decision in her mind without cluing you in.

Finally, her judgments of you will get more noticeable towards the very end. She might pick a fight, or start an argument about something that’s seemingly insignificant. She will make sweeping generalizations about your character as a whole. At this point she’s looking for an exit strategy. She’s already made her decision and now she’s trying to find a way to end it, whether she goes out peacefully, or with a “bang”.

It is usually at this point that you may feel that coolness from her, that you wonder if she even cared. Remember, that she’s probably been going through the process of breaking up with you, for a while, by this time.


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