What If Losing Your Ex Feels Like You Lost Your Best Friend?

I hope you enjoyed the video.

Just to review the points from the video in case you might have missed any of them.

So, what do you do if losing your ex feels like you lost your best friend?

First, identify that you have been contributing to the idea of a “Special Relationship” a “Special Love”.  Start to rekindle any relationships that you might’ve abandoned.  Entrust parts of yourself with other people, allow yourself to be quirky or weird in your relationships.  Don’t wait for another man to come around to feel like you can be yourself again.

Second, start becoming your own best friend.  What does this mean?

Well, if your ex used to buy you flowers or cook you dinner, start buying yourself flowers and cooking yourself and your new found friends dinner.  Do things for yourself that he might have done for you.  Start loving yourself and showing yourself love.  Take care of yourself!

Finally, ask yourself this one question.  Does your life partner have to be the same person as your best friend?

Answer honestly this question for yourself.  Do the qualities of a best friend elicit love and passion in a relationship?

We can most always find a best friend who is platonic.  We can find a best friend in a girl friend or a family member, this role doesn’t always have to be left to your life partner.

So, those are the 3 points and action steps that I made in the video.  Please come back to this video anytime you need to revisit this topic.

Remember, love is a universal concept.  Love is everywhere.  You can have different types of relationships, but try not to rely too heavily on your life partner as that “Special Love” that you give everything to.  It will alleviate pressure off of your future relationships, and may even prevent future breakups.

Here’s to healing your heart!

with gratitude,

Katya

katya@breakupadvice.com

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1 Comment

  1. Debakavita says:

    it all the time.2. She chekcs his phone’s inbox. She says her mom told her to, but I don’t she says she chekcs cause he is a lady’s man and she wants to be updated too.3. He started checking her phone. I don’t know since when. He saw my messages and pics. He said that she’s too young to go out with a guy and kinda insults me. She’s a teenager by the way.4. She said before that she follows him on dates. She says she wants to see him mess up but I think she’s jealous or something.5. He saw her naked before. She says it’s on accident, but I don’t know. I don’t know if she saw him naked or not, but she did catch him having sex with his gf before.6. When we have a misunderstanding and argument, she would ask me at the end, don’t you think I’m acting like a bitch lately? I don’t know what to say. I don’t think so, so I told her no, but I read somewhere, that a girl saying/thinking that isn’t a good sign, but we have been having misunderstandings lately.7. Her brother had sex with his gf, fully knowing that he doesn’t want to be with her forever. He told my gf that. I feel he was trying to explain to her, like a husband to a wife when he has an affair.8. She gets mood swings sometimes and she knows perverted stuff. I don’t fully know how. She says she overhears from friends conversation and from movies on accident.9. When I told her what I thought, she defends him. Fully saying that he isn’t that sort of guy, when he clearly was using his gf for sex in my opinion.10. They fight when their parents aren’t around to see. She told me they were just messing around and stuff . but I don’t feel comfortable with it.11. They are alone a lot, since both parents work at least until 5pm. At least once, they were alone all day.12. She never asks what I’m up to, but she chekcs her bro’s phone to see what he is up to. I don’t feel the love. Like she loves him more and doesn’t care what I do. Like I’m an excuse for her or a substitute for not legally being able to be with her brother.13. Her bro isn’t that much older than her. Within dating and marriage ages. 14. She tells me a lot of times that incest is gross and stuff. She probably thinks that, but I don’t know about her brother. I don’t like him. I suspect him to know, yet still doing it. She doesn’t know, and when i tell her, she gets upset with me and fully defends him and tell me I’m wrong.15. I heard him banging the door to her shower before when I talked to her on the phone. She told him: don’t you dare come in or something.16. Their rooms are next to each other. The bathroom is in the middle and the rooms are connected. He can enter from main door to her room or through bathroom I think.I know this is long, but please help me out on this one. I don’t know what to do. Their relationship, seem too close to be just family love. I even asks my dad about it, and he says that’s not right. I really love her, so I would like to know if these are signs of incest at least on her brother’s part or not. Or am I overthinking? It’s really bothering me and when I tell her, she gets upset at me and defends her brother. Is this incest (or at least her brother wanting/thinking of sexual thoughts about his sister) or am I thinking too much? And what am I supposed to do?I do not often ask her this. I only asked and told her today, and once long ago.1-4 times before actually like little bits of it since I wasn’t really bothered by it until today.

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